A friend just asked me what my family “does” for Mother’s
Day. My response - our family doesn’t really “do” anything big or special for
Mother’s Day or Father’s Day, which I guess is our own tradition. Also, I
selfishly claim that because my birthday is always on or very close to the
second Sunday in May, it takes trump. As a kid, I even insisted on celebrating
my birthday on Mother’s Day every year at the pizza place where they would give
me one of the pink carnations they were handing out to mothers. What can I say,
it made me feel special and also like I had pulled one over on “the man.” Ha!
I don’t know why we don’t celebrate the way other (seemingly
functional) families do with brunch or lunch and cards and cake and that
butt-ugly Jane Seymour jewelry I’m sure LOTS of disappointed mothers have been
gifted. My parents, despite my sharing their stories for them in writing, are very private people – always have been,
always will be – which seems ironic considering I am the master/mistress of TMI
(stories about shitting one’s pants… been there, done that! See previous
posts.) Except for within our inner circle, the immediate family, my parents
shy away from all attention and fuss. My mom has even thought ahead to the unwanted
attention she might receive after her hopefully very distant but eventual death
– no funeral, and if the law would allow, stick her in a garbage bag at the end
of the driveway on trash pick-up day. I don’t know if Mom has big plans for an
obituary as it would draw attention, but if one is allowed, it will no doubt be
something brutally succinct, as in “Bad news… [Mom’s name] died.” The end.
Just because we have no big customs or elaborate
celebrations for these Hallmark holidays doesn’t mean my family doesn’t value
them or their meaning. I will call Mom on Sunday, like I do every Mother’s Day,
to acknowledge the holiday and wish her the best. A bit of a formality we mutually
understand, but I think she appreciates the call nonetheless. And I will call
my dad on Father’s Day to do the same and be met with a quick “thanks” mumbled
back in slight embarrassment before we move on to more important conversation
that will certainly put less “unnecessary” attention on him. It’s the same
every year. See! We have our traditions, after all! And I look forward to them
just the same.
I think I speak for many. We are so happy you are writing again! Keep them coming. And I look forward to the traditional call Sunday. Or you could show up with that bucket of kfc!
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